Help for alcohol addiction Pennsylvania

When Someone You Love Drinks Too Much

You cannot force your loved one into treatment or make them stop drinking. No matter how strongly you feel that they need help, it is up to them to take that first step. The best thing you can do for someone who drinks too much is to express concern about their drinking and encourage them to get help.

If you're close to someone who drinks too much alcohol, you probably have mixed feelings. On the one hand, you want what's best for the person you love. On the other hand, you may feel angry and hurt because of the ways drinking has affected you and your relationship.

Signs Your Loved One Needs Help

Signs that drinking has become a problem often do not just appear overnight. In most cases, it is a gradual progression from social use of alcohol to more frequent, high-volume consumption. While each person's experience with AUD may be different, the following are some common signs that may indicate a loved one has an alcohol problem:

• Frequently consuming more alcohol than intended
• Drinking alcohol in ways that increase risks, such as drinking and driving
• Trying to stop or reduce use of alcohol but unable to do so
• Continuing to drink despite problems with relationships, school, work, or health
• Having cravings for alcohol or feeling withdrawal symptoms when not drinking

It is important to remember that you cannot force a loved one into treatment. However, family members and friends can offer support and encouragement. It is important to make sure your own health and well-being come first so that you can continue to provide effective support.

How to Talk About Drinking

Your loved one may try to convince you that drinking isn't a problem or isn't causing much harm. You might feel frustrated and confused by his or her reactions, especially if the consequences have been obvious to you. But when you're close to someone with an alcohol problem, it's easy to be drawn into helping him or her, being lied to, making excuses, taking responsibility for his or her behavior, and trying to keep the situation quiet. You can start by explaining that you're concerned about the effect of alcohol on your loved one and on those around him or her. Be specific by describing events or behaviors you've noticed that cause concern. Focus on your own reactions rather than placing blame or being judgmental. Explain how this behavior affects you, your relationship with your loved one, or others.

You can't make someone get treatment for alcohol use disorder. However, there are ways to encourage a person to seek help while maintaining a loving and supportive environment. The following tips may help:

• Don't wait for the situation to worsen before taking action. The sooner you take steps to address your loved one's problem drinking, the better.
• Avoid becoming defensive or angry when talking about treatment options. Try to stay calm and empathetic.

Talk about drinking when your loved one has a clear mind. It's not good timing to bring up the topic during an argument. Choose a time when you feel relaxed and comfortable, when there won't be interruptions, and when you both have enough time to talk. You'll want to choose somewhere away from other people so they can't overhear what you're saying.

Choose your words carefully. Make sure that your loved one understands that alcohol is the problem, not him or her. Let him or her know that he or she isn't a bad person, but that he or she has an illness. Tell your loved one that you love and care about him or her and want to help.

What Not to Do

Don't expect too much from yourself. It is difficult to help someone who does not want to stop drinking. You may be able to reduce the negative consequences of alcohol abuse, but in the end your loved one's decision to drink must come from within.

Avoid the following behaviors that are common mistakes made by families and friends:

• Not making it clear you are concerned about a problem.
• Making threats, such as cutting off money.
• Arguing or lecturing.
• Giving up too quickly on attempts to get help.
• Getting into power struggles (telling your loved one what to do, forcing consequences, not following through with consequences).

Don't try to force the person into treatment or recovery. This is a waste of energy and may cause him or her to shut down.

Don't blame yourself, your loved one, or anyone else for his or her alcohol problem.

Don't give up on someone who has relapsed. There are no quick fixes in treating AUD. A lapse does not mean that the person can never recover, nor should it be taken as a sign that you should abandon your efforts. On the contrary, a relapse is actually an opportunity to try again with new insight and skills.

Don't give mixed messages. If you offer treatment options at one time but then go back on these recommendations later, it will only confuse things.

Don't enable behaviors that support alcohol use. Don't do anything for the person he or she can do for himself or herself.

Avoid ganging up or backing someone into a corner. Don't try to force him or her into treatment. People who struggle with alcohol use disorder often feel judged, ashamed and defensive. They may react strongly if they perceive that you are criticizing them or trying to take away their power of choice. Avoid arguments and lectures about the dangers of alcohol.

Don't try to take responsibility for another person's behavior or life choices. You can help encourage your loved one to seek treatment and support him or her while doing so, but ultimately, he or she will have to take the steps necessary to recover.

Don't be afraid to let your loved one make mistakes and experience the natural consequences of drinking. Sometimes it is better for a person to learn from his or her own mistakes rather than having you impose restrictions, which can feel punitive.

The Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT) approach is based on an intervention model that has been shown to be effective in changing the drinking behaviors of alcohol-dependent individuals. CRAFT is a nonconfrontational approach. It avoids the typical "tough love" style of family confrontation used by other models. Families using this approach learn how to use their influence in ways that are more likely to lead to change and help-seeking behavior by alcohol-dependent people.

Helping Someone Find Treatment

If someone is struggling with AUD, it's important to seek help for that person. It's especially important if he or she has tried unsuccessfully to quit drinking on his or her own several times. When you're having a conversation with your loved one about seeking help for alcohol use disorder, the conversation will go better if you can do the following:

• Try not to judge
• Let him or her know that you're worried
• Offer to find and review some treatment options together
• Help connect him or her with a doctor or treatment program

When offering these things, try not to make your loved one feel as though he or she is being "told" what to do. You can also offer help with transportation, childcare, and other practical aspects of attending a treatment program.

A primary care visit can open the door to referrals to specialists who can address AUD. They may also make a referral to a mental health professional for evaluation and treatment of these symptoms if needed.

It may also be helpful to talk with the treatment center ahead of time. Find out if family visits are allowed. Ask whether there are special programs for families. A good addiction treatment center will want you and your loved one to have support.

Support for Family Members

Family therapy is offered at many addiction treatment programs and focuses on the ways that a person's drinking affects the whole family, including other siblings and children living in the home. This type of treatment usually involves couples or family members meeting with a therapist together and learning how to communicate more effectively, set reasonable boundaries, and support one another without enabling addictive behaviors.

For those who are not ready for formal addiction therapy, family recovery groups such as Al-Anon can be helpful. Family members affected by someone else's drinking problem may gather to learn about alcoholism, share experiences, receive emotional support, and plan to address the disease together. Members of Al-Anon are not expected to become experts on alcoholism; instead, they help one another recover from the effects of an addicted person in their lives.

Al-Anon meetings give relatives a place to get emotional support from others who have experienced similar issues with a loved one's drinking. Al-Anon is not affiliated with Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), but its members often use AA's 12-step program of recovery.

SMART Recovery also has a separate support group for families and friends of those in recovery.

Taking Care of Yourself

Caring for someone with AUD can be stressful and overwhelming. It is important that you recognize your own needs, and find ways to take care of yourself. If you are developing symptoms of depression or anxiety, consider seeking professional help for yourself. You may want to look into support groups such as Al-Anon, which can provide a safe space to share your experiences with other people in similar situations, learn coping skills, and gain encouragement.

It is also important to remember that, although you want the best for your loved one, he or she is ultimately responsible for managing his or her own alcohol problems. Your participation may be helpful and even critical, but keep in mind it takes time and effort to make progress with a chronic illness such as AUD. Try not to be discouraged if setbacks occur - they are common among people who overcome drinking problems. If your loved one does return to heavy drinking, try to remember that treatment is available for relapse, too.

• Find support from family members, friends, other loved ones, or a mutual support group.
• Join a support group for people who have similar experiences and can understand what you are going through.
• Be patient with your loved one. Try not to expect immediate results.
• Learn about the illness.
• Take steps to take care of yourself physically (including sleep, exercise, nutrition).
• Recognize that you cannot solve all of your loved one's problems, nor do they have to be solved before treatment can begin.
• Understand and accept that recovery is a process and that setbacks are common but do not mean failure.
• Try not to take the person's behavior personally. Understand that it is part of their illness.

Getting Help in Pennsylvania

If you are concerned about a loved one's excessive drinking or drug use, reach out to an SCA. They can assist with assessments and make referrals to treatment providers.

Screening, assessment, referral, and treatment planning are key to ensuring that you get the right level of care for your needs. It's important for both clients and their loved ones to understand what screening and assessment mean, how they work together, and why they're a necessary first step in receiving addiction treatment.

Treatment Atlas helps loved ones compare licensed behavioral healthcare facilities so they can find the one that best meets their needs. Search by location or filter to view only those services relevant to you.

Pennsylvania residents who are eligible for Medicaid may be able to get substance abuse treatment benefits through that program.

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